I never deserved that!

IB Travelogue

SEM 2 result is OUT!

Subhanallah! the whole week! I kept on thinking about my result. 
Asking Allah swt to give me the strength. To IKHLAS all my effort!
All the time I spent to seek his ilmu, the knowledge!
The moment I clicked on the link Kolej Mara Banting, My heart pounding! Very fast! 
My head spinning lah. Huh! How worried I am on that moment.
Searching for my IC Number.
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My tears burst. It was a different experienced for me compared to the last time (Sem 1 result)
Actually...


 It is not about the result! not about that!
We are living in this world, given breath by him. 
Just to find ALLAH'S love and
just to know him closer. 
Our CREATOR! 

We are nobody friend. 
without his blessings. we are not special!
Ya Allah! I never deserved what I achieved today!
I have a lot ! So much! SIN to you!
If compared to my result
Who am I to get that privilege? 
I am just nobody. 
A person who full of Sin!

There are a lot of nikmat you have given to me!
Too many! Too much!
Your love, everything!
Thank you ya Allah swt for your blessings

All I can say, this whole sem 2, taught me
to always stay close to Allah!
Sacrifice time just for Allah!
Always remember the goal in my life!
To seek his blessings
Always IKHLAS in every matter that I do!
To always fight against my desire
Doing bad things
To always think beyond the limit, the hikmah!
To always stay strong! Stronger internally!

Yes! this whole sem is the summarization of my journey 
to find the new me.
to develop my inner strength
AND 
to Always! Always! Always! believe in HIM.
ask, cry, story all of your harship only to HIM
In sya allah!

IB is the academy to shape a strong muslimah internally and externally!
In sya allah!
Stay strong babeh! 
Stay strong!
Depends only on Allah swt!

Reminds me to always reflect on who I am to
questioned all the things that happen to me.

I watched Ratatouille!!!

2007 movie with rating of 8/10 about 

a rat name Remy who is very ambitious to change the world!

"I don't want to steal, I want to make things!"

He wants to be a chef!

Guess what! It was my first time watching Ratatuiii!!!

Okay! it is actually Ratatouille! Yeah!

I never watch it before! 

(My brother even laugh at me for my excitement while watching this movie)

And I am being so ANALYTICAL about this movie!

Wonderful experience!

I can see behind the plot. There is a message hidden there!

It was such a great process for me!

It was also the first time for me to analyse this movie into different perspectives

and brings it alive to this world.

What I mean by that is apply it and see the connection between the theory and 

the life.

Actually what I am writing about? There are so much thing going in my head. 

I just need to write and never “ backspace”

That how our life goes… move forward and never turn back again!

Yeah! It is so simple! Every day is a brand new day! For you to be closer to the Creator.

Allah Al- Mighty. In sya allah!

Okay go back to Ratattuiiiii

Well what I can see through the plot, there are a theme that appears 
dominantly for me

1) Discrimination

I questioned myself why the colour of the rat is black? Not white? 

Or it is the nature of the rats living in the drain must be black in colour?

Then, it suit with my opinion, which the black rat symbolizes the black people

or specifically to the African community. 

During the 1960, the Apartheid Law for the African has made them under 

the discrimination of British. Because of their skin colour, they are seen as 

disgusting, defenseless, and underprivileged and they are treated as slave. 

They are nobody and meaningless to the world. 

We discriminate people and abandoned them!

 

Same goes to the rat, the animals that live in dirty place and 

their appearance it being hate. 

However, to think it logically, when we sees rat our first reaction is either 

to scream or kill them. 

Oh! Sorry rat! Your presence may bring harm with all of the bacteria 

next to your toes.

The author really wants to criticize how the community actually react

in front of the African and being so prejudiced to them. 

They have no place in this community.

Out of sudden, my brain switch to a different perspective. 

Can I dig into the political side?

Yeah! 

Remy (the rat) is not welcomed by human. But, because of his talent to cook,

with the ability to trace poisonous food, he managed to innovate the recipe. 

Then, it becoming the Unit Selling Point ( USP ) for the Restaurant. 

Everyone loves it!

This story, if we brings it to the real world, then, same goes to Barack Obama, 

which now the president of United States of America, the first black

people representative! 

With his ability, he is accepted by the community and becoming one 

of the most influencing man in this world.

Yeah!

Okay. This theme, is only my opinion and perspective. Thanks for reading!

IKHLAS

Surah Al- Ghafir 40: 65

Dia lah Yang Tetap Hidup;

tiada Tuhan( yang berhak disembah) melainkan Dia; 

maka sembahlah kamu akan Dia dengan 

mengikhlaskan amal ugama kamu kepadaNya semata- mata. 

Segala puji bagi Allah Tuhan yang metadbir sekalian alam.

~IKHLAS~

" eh, kau lah pulak kena belanja aku, hari tu kan aku dah tolong kau"

IKHLAS. Perbuatan yang melibatkan HATI.

Hati nurani manusia ini akan dipenuhi dan dihiasi dengan dua perkara sahaja

yakni sama ada perkara yang membawa kita dekat kepada Allah Ya Rabb

atau perkara yang membuatkan kita lalai daripada tujuan hidup kita yang sebenar.

Nampaknya, pilihan memang terletak di tangan kita.

YA BETUL sudah tertulis semuanya di Luh Mahfuz

tetapi ia juga atas pilihan kita,

Kembali kepada IKHLAS

Bagaimana mahu ikhlas?

Masihku ingat syllabus Pendidikan Islam di sekolah dulu

Syarat penerimaan sesuatu ibadah itu ada 3

1) Niat kerana Allah swt

2) Ikhlas

3) Cara yang menepati syarak

Begitu besar sumbangan IKHLAS kepada ibadah kita.

Tugas kita di muka bumi ini ialah:

Beribadah kepada Allah swt dan menjadi khalifahnya.

Tanpa ikhlas, adakah akan diterima ibadah kita?

Meskipun kita tahu bahawa hanya Allah swt yang membuat penilaian

Tetapi tidak salah untuk kita 

beribadah dengan bersungguh dan ikhlas.

Bukan kerana kita inginkan pahala,

Tetapi untuk melunaskan tanggungjawab kita

sebagai hamba Allah swt. 

Aku duduk terdiam. Memikirkannya.

 IKHLAS! IKHLAS! IKHLAS!

Bagaimana???????

Aku buntu; kerana sebagai seorang hamba, kita semestinya menginginkan

ibadah yang dimanisfestasikan itu adalah yang 

TERBAIK

THE BEST EVERH.

Buat TUHAN yang telah memberikan segalanya kepada kita.

Ar- rahman.

Allahu. jangan dibicara masalah hati. 

Begitu banyak sekali benda yang tak settle.

Jika hendak dibual tentang riak, sum'ah, takabbur. 

Itu sudah cukup membuktikan problem hati 

yang menghantui seorang Muslim

itupun kalau kita SEDAR dan tidak tenggelam dalam permainan syaitan.

BERTAUBATLAH!

Statement itu buat ku terfikir.

Mira... statement yang mana?

Statement yang awal sekali tu.

Hehe

Kalau dia ikhlas menolong, pasti dia tak ungkit dan tidak mengharapkan apa- apa balasan daripada temannya ketika dia dalam keadaan susah.

Mashallah!

Tidak kah engkau sedar wahai Amirah?

Wahai sahabat handaiku?

Itulah jawapan untuk IKHLAS!

IKHLAS ialah KAMU MELAKUKAN SESUATU KERANA ALLAH SWT! 

TANPA MENGHARAPAKAN APA-APA BALASAN DARIPADANYA!

KERANA KITA HANYA HAMBANYA!!!

Ya Allah! Aku belajar ilmu ini, 

bersusah payah menuntut ilmu,

HANYA keranaMU!

bukan kerana periksa, 

bukan kerana ingin result yang baik,

BUKAN!

Ya Allah! Aku solat Dhuha ini,

HANYA KERANA mu!

bukan kerana aku ingin fadhilat dimurahkan rezeki.

sudah cukup. SANGAT CUKUP! rezekimu terhadapku.

Segala puji bagi Allah.

Ya Allah aku buat sesuatu ini,

Hanya PADAmu!

Ya! IKHLAS perlu di WORK OUT!

bukan badan sahaja tau.

(Opppppsssss)

Mungkin mengambil masa yang lama

Perlunya untuk kita berusaha kearah mencapai ikhlas.

Mulai hari ini. Belajarlah berkata.

"Ya Allah! AKU BUAT SEMUA INI HANYA UNTUKMU!

dan AKU TIDAK MENGHARAPKAN APA-APA BALASAN!

Thanks for reading :)

If today never exist!

Bismillahirrahmanirrahim

If today never exist!

The blue sky; white cloud; I am looking up high!

The green colony, thorn, woody, with fruit, juicy enough!

Blossoming; smiling; a  mixture of colour and odour

So bright! Sparkling the emotion in me!

With smile yet the tears;

If today never exist!

 The solid question to be asked.

Will I exist?

Witnessing all the creature

presence in every part of dimension

even the end side of me, 

The human!

Sensing the smells, taste, 

Living in red,yellow, blue

The basic of life

Yet I never wonder

If Allah swt hold back the nikmat from me!

If today never exist! 

I will be blindly walking, pacing to the corner

between darkness; burried the soul; died with regretful

or the array of the light; giving life and hope 

to the hollow body; the vanishing part

if not been polished

How the path have save me

Grabbing the time I am drowning

in this blurry life; tick tok ; that will stop 

SOON......

Alhamdulillah!

If today never exist!

Holding tightly; fingers; hands; never let it go

The soft yet hard voice, echoing in my whole heart

Reflecting the real me.

Shaping the virtue inside me, 

From the day, eyes were widely viewing

 to the day of it never blinking again

If today never exist!

The bonding from them,

Loving; Caring; Supporting 

creating and preserving, 

Paying back all of the sweat

to train me in becoming

the warrior, fighting against

the pessimistic thought

Sinking, Hiding, threatening my inner strength

Never turn back;

Stay where I am

Standing; with the pride;

Spread the good, the vibes, the charge

that will change others life.

Be the one you make a choice 

Guiding from slipping

If today never exist!

Saying to myself; deeply inside

only two words to say

ALHAMDULILLAH!

and

I AM NO ONE WITHOUT ALLAH'S BLESSING!

# Writing on my 22nd April 2015. 

The day my mom heard my cries for the first time.

Between "Profesional" & "Choice"

Bismillahirrahmanirrahim
On this very fine evening, I am writing this entry to actually express my feeling;
How can I say? Is it the anger? The anger to them or  actually to myself?

It is the reality man! Reality in your society! In the Islamic community!
Major community!


They are all absolutely brilliant. From different background of  education or even 
perhaps the Islamic education.

Allah swt has given us the choice to choose.
To USE our wisdom,
And to THINK about our daily life,

Is it suit with WHAT ALLAH SWT wants?
Actually for real
what are we achieving on?

The HAPPINESS?
oh yes!
what happiness?
to you?
oh yes!


Dear Muslimin and Muslimat
We are struggling to BE AWARDED with ALLAH'S BLESSING
in this very challenging DUNYA and AKHIRAT
in sya allah!

But, why?
why are we neglecting HIS COMMAND ?
It is for our own good right?
Of course for the good!
Because he is our lord! 
The one that CREATES us!

let's get back to the BASIC.
Istigfar for our wrong doing
and ask for His forgiveness
Istigfar for not doing things
just to get blessing and redha

and istigfar for achieving 
our own pleasure.

Wait. wait wait! 
What is happening?
What is the correlation between my previous saying and the title of this entry?

Honestly, I am talking about IKHTILAT
How man and woman interact with each other.
Is it serious?
Why people not looking it something that need to be FOCUS in?
How about your pride?
Keeping away from the FITNAH!
Especially to a woman ?

May be they are not realising it.
or they don't know
But people have choice!

You can choose. 
You can just ask the guy to go to another table in the library
Or you made you own move. Avoiding from it. From ZINA.
Allahu!

You can just walk or speak alone with our same gender
Studying with same gender
Asking  to give help from same gender
What else? with same gender.
EAT, TALK. PLAY
They understand you better than the opposite gender, 
Not the guy!
What else THEY can do?

We have our family. They are our priority
The one that is there!

It is not about being professional in this two gender relationship
It is about making the better choice! 
If you can avoid being together... then do it!
If it is the only choice especially in group discussion
Then, you can still avoid it ! 
Avoid saying unnecessary things
For sure.

Let make a move friends! 
I love u girls
with all my heart!
It just I may not have the gut to voice this out!
Or
I have to think positively
I have to think positively?
me?

Yes I can do it. But what about the other?
Can they think the same as me?
Or even worst 
It is becoming the norm!
That fades away all the important things

People tends to see it as a correct things
ETHICS!
When people do it, achieving the consensus
Then it is the right thing to do,
Open your us!

Al quran has provided everything! 
The guidance to differentiate the truth and the wrong.
May Allah swt guides us!